VA: Want to Stop Your Children From Smoking? Scar Them for Life!
Jul 30th, 2007
(21 votes, average: 3.14 out of 5)
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Even as a 4 year old child, I idolized my Father. They say that mimicry is the sincerest (and most annoying) form of flattery, so I tried my best to […]
Original post: Want to Stop Your Children From Smoking? Scar Them for Life!
My dad tried that on me with beer when I was about nine, thinking I would hate it and quit bugging him to have a taste. Didn’t work; I loved it, which totally annoyed him.
Same here.
What if both parents don’t smoke and the kid has no reason to want to smoke while a kid? How to skar him so that he doesn’t smoke when he’s a teenager?
Pictures of the lungs of a long-time smoker with cancer worked well for me. Just type “smoker’s lungs” into google, and you’ll see what I mean.
Listening to various members of my family and friends of the family hacking and wheezing their way through a pack of smokes was enough to discourage me from ever taking up the habit. I suppose they did scare me out of it, sort of.
So, if my lungs won’t help anybody medically, can I donate them to re- pave my neighbors driveways? Or, depending on how much tar has accumulated, maybe some county highways?
Wow, yeah, you’re not supposed to inhale the smoke from a cigar… You know, I can personally testify that this works at much older ages too. Sure, it takes a bit more… like improperly smoking an entire cigar in a short amount of time… but trust me, it’s no fun to overdose on nicotine.
This is truer than you can imagine. After my parents split up, I had to go to my dad’s house every weekend, and he and his new family smoke a lot. So much that the interior of the house is saturated in the odor, and your clothes and hair will be too if you hang around for more than a few minutes. And the best thing this has done for me is make me never, ever want to intentionally inhale smoke. The prospect of doing so is just revolting to me, drugs are pretty much completely ruled out too. Even being in the presence of cigarette smoke feels like death. And if every other kid experienced this, the world would probably be a better place.
It’s not sexy, it’s not cool, it’s just disgusting.
My dad did the same exact thing to me… only it was a shot of gin when I was six. It was the foulest taste I could ever imagine. All the way through high school I never wanted a drink of anything, and even now, at 27, I stick to the whisky and keep well, well away from gin.
So what I figure I’ll do is make a list of things I don’t want my future kids to do, and make them do it while they’re young. First will be a drink and a cigar, then we’ll drunk-drive, spend a few months in jail, maybe shank a guy. We’ll pirate some movies and cds from the internet, steal somebody’s car and flash some people at a movie theater.
That’s the way, I think, to make a well-behaved kid. I’ll write back in a decade and let you know how it goes.
Hahah Steve nice one.
While i kind of admire this V.. its kind of like implanting your kid. You are not giving him the idiotic choice of whether or not he can smoke.. The freedom to decide.
While I did quit smoking on my own… I always admired my dad’s smoking too. Id watch him and want to smoke.
I guess I like it cause you keep your kids from possibly smoking… but its by the use of subterfuge. I know also of a lady that tried this on her 6 year old… this is not a joke… believe it or dont.. My friends 6 year old had been haggling her non stop for a ciggarette. Finally she said fine and expected her to start coughing.. but instead she just smoked it and was like arrrrrrghhh I really needed that. She was soo shocked and told her kid she may not smoke!!
The kid begged her and begged her as daughters do.. finally she got permission to smoke at age 14.. and at that time she started smoking and still does.
Anyways.. Im sure this doesnt happen often.. but it does.
hahaha, that happened to me with a cigarette and im only 18. i have though of doing this when i have kids. 6 billion people is really a small world to have the same experiences.
My dad saw me aiming my toy gun at a friend. He said, “You want to shoot someone?” and forced me to take a real pistol and point it at a friend. “BLAM!” and I blew away the friend.
Jeez, I liked that a lot! The blood, gore, smell of gunsmoke and the immediate impact on my environment.
Since then, I’ve become a hitman for hire. I make more in one weekend than you do in a year. And it’s still great fun.
Also, I always use Palmolive soap. Keeps my trigger finger nice and limber.
I’m still looking for my old Brooklyn Tech classmate, John Perronet, who invented rockets when he was a teenager. Brilliant guy. Where the hell is he now?
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