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I was at a business meeting Monday, sitting in a room full of rich executives, fiddling with what the department store clerk called ‘my new power suit,’ casually sipping a […]
Original post: How To Escape Public Humiliation
Just like normal clowns, “God’s Clowns” scare the shit out of me.
Ah, the old V is back! I love it.
Glad to have you back as well!! And I am so using that next meeting I make a klutz of myself…I normally just say “whoops” and move on with a slightly reddened face :)
I know when I want to convince a bunch of strangers on the internet that I don’t care about something, I always write 12 paragraphs about it. Because writing 12 paragraphs about not caring clearly shows that I don’t care.
You got it wrong Roy!
LMAO Roy.
I don’t know, Roy. That article seemed less about convincing people she doesn’t care about something and more like advice to “Chicken Liver” to me. But then again, I can read. YMMV.
So Dooce-bashing still works for generating traffic? Gee, I really have to try that too. I’m not getting enough hits, not by a long shot.
As much as I agree with the general idea of the post, these whole bloggy wars crack me up. I’m afraid I was in the wrong group in high school - I was with the geeks instead of with the popular kids so I never really got into this whole catty, cliqueish way of life. I wouldn’t dedicate my blog to sucking up to Dooce, but neither would I dedicate my blog to trashing Dooce - because for one thing, you would have to read Dooce in order to trash her posts and you just can’t make me. And, for another, it is just borrrrring. Life is too short to dedicate it to bashing a total stranger who isn’t even interesting. So, um, yeah, I don’t support either side in this rather pointless battle.
But the main reason why I’m writing this comment, female circumcision? Oh give me a dang break. Many of my friends went to BlogHer and apparently had a blast. To them it’s about getting together with their longtime online friends. It’s like the least antisocial motive there is. Calling people social rejects because they want to hang out with people they know and like is, imo, a bit of a stretch, but to each his own.
Finally, did V just admit having been outed? If so, she lives an hour away from me. Boy do I feel speshul. We’ll be camping in V’s area this weekend and she is welcome to join us. We’ll be the cool-lloking Russian speaking group with a bunch of snarky teenage kids. This is just too funny so I have to leave you, I’ve got to go chuckle and then post something nasty about Dooce cuz I still need those hits.
If V doesn’t care about being outed why did she change her name on the dog training site? It is not as if dog training is scandalous, and she talked about her love of animals anyway…so V, you have a dog training business. Next topic.
V, I enjoy some of your posts.
In other news, I’m sitting in my closet wearing nothing but a pair of tube socks and plaid boxers.
Discuss.
lmao @ window lickers.
I love you, V!!!
Thankfully, I have grown tired of V’s (Hollie’s) lack of substance. Perhaps, she might get a job besides sitting on her obese, cottage cheese ass and wishing she could be in a soap opera all her own. What a sad example of literary genius. And, to think she prides herself on suckering others into loving her. Ha!. Poor men lusting after a fat sow. Her significant other prides himself on his lovely wife prostituting herself online… Hilarious. Get real people. You enjoy her hype as much as she does. Buy a book. Hey!! Look!!! I didn’t put any redirect or webisite for you go to. WTF? I don’t give a whit. Get a life, folks.
And I’m tired of people thinking she’s actually Ms. Dog Whisperer. And if she is: big fucking deal. And I actually mean it, unlike the losers around here that pretend not to care.
If her posts make you feel bad, suck it up and do something with your life to make it better.
Bravo, V. You really do come across as a cunt and your writing was getting a bit stale there for some time, but your response to the drama about your identity being revealed (oops, I mean ChickenLiver’s identity being revealed) is absolutely PERFECT.
Great post from V.
I read the linked Chickenliver posts, and I am a little confused. Why would Dooce - or anyone - care if this person went to Blogher or not? There a million “I Hate” blogs out there, what’s special about this one?
Anyway, the “I Hate” blogs are so dull. It’s the same crap over and over again - if you’re going to waste your time on something you hate (which I don’t understand in the first place - have they nothing better to do?) then for fuck’s sake, at least make it fun to read. Witty and incisive would be nice. Hint: “LOLOLOL OMG Dooce is anorexic and her husband is ghey!” is neither.
*sigh* And all the (str8) guys are just thinking “ooh, cat fight, cat fight.” Great.
“Hint: “LOLOLOL OMG Dooce is anorexic and her husband is ghey!” is neither.”
Saying people’s kids look like they have down syndrome, over and over again isn’t very interesting either.
Especially when it’s an obvious attempt to piss off another ‘Mommy Blogger’ so she can generate traffic after being away from her blog from so long.
(Prepare yourself for a word that I concider to be used only if a sentence is weak and you want to make it look like a strong sentence.)
Fucking-A!
I take too embarassment as ego-centric, selfish. “So you think you are so much different and better than the rest of us that this mistake was somehow unique?”
The same goes for nakedness. Unless you have a third nipple or testicles growing from your knees, I don’t believe I haven’t seen anything you have to offer already.
You are not special. You are not unique. I don’t believe in snowflakes.
Besides, laughing at yourself is an excellent tool to make those extremely rude and politically incorrect jokes that you can’t tell about anyone else.
Like couple weeks ago. I was in a bar (surprisingly). And as I usually do, I was strolling around and talking to strangers. Too boring to stay only with your friends all the time. I want to meet new people all the time. I saw these three Dutch guys and ended up having a philosophical chat. Can’t remember what. I guess The Madman Nietzsche and how Gay Science is was mentioned. I remember enjoying that conversation, although now can’t remember what we talked about.
But the meaning of my cheerfullness came from one of the other Dutch guys. Some young guy, maybe 20ish, who obviously has gotten used to be the centre of attention. He stopped chatting with the third Dutch guy, but he couldn’t add anything to the conversation. So he made couple of semi-snappy insults, but not really insulting. Kind of probing insults. I asked him if he is trying to be the silverback. In such case I can also stop the conversation with the other guy and just go. Be the silverback. Have a banana.
But he said that “well, not really. I know I could get you to turn red and run away if I want to. Right guys?” - A challenge, eh? I can’t pass this. I asked him to make me blush and run away.
What happened next really disappointed me. Just some random insults about my appearance and what we spoke and my accent and such… Just regular insults. How boring. After couple of sentences of this non-stop mindless rambling I just started to pick on everything he said and push it further.
“Yeah, you milk skinned…”
“I know, so white that when I take my shirt of in the sun I divert the planes.”
“You don’t even go out to the sun…”
“I know I live like a vampire, but in the sun I tan like a lobster in a boiler.”
“…*something about freckled face*…”
“Exactly! And after I’m not the color of a fire truck, I still don’t get tanned… My freckles just join together.”
After a while he was all of a sudden silent.
And I knew who was the silverback.
(Sorry, one sentence was incompleted, which changes the meaning of the sentence significantly. My housemate came presistently to confuse me with something unimportant. And I get confused easily. I can even do it to myself.)
The correct sentence:
I saw these three Dutch guys and ended up having a philosophical chat [with one of them].
But V has deleted posts from here. I wonder why?
Err maybe because her identity has been revealed and she wrote so much shit about everyone, including people close to her. Just a wild guess.
Hey Sami,
WTF was that rambling about!?!?! You lost me at Prepare yourself… Such idiocy coming from a “silverback”.
Sami was hoping that whoever read that story would wonder ‘wtf is she on about’ and click on her name, thus increasing traffic to her blog.
Its all marketing, baby.
Athena’s comment made me want to click over to Sami’s, so I did. It’s a decent site. Thanks Athena for the lead.
You guys ##23-24 need to give us furriners a break. This is not our native language. Can you write a comment in Dutch? or Finnish? Thought so. Anyway, for those interested, I think I can translate. The way I see it, the gist of Sami’s comment is that the best way to field possible insults/humiliation is to laugh at yourself first. Like, for instance, this guy in the bar was hurling insults at her and she was agreeing with every one of them and turning them around to make them look cute/funny, so eventually he gave up. Not necessarily the route I would’ve taken, but apparently it worked. Any more questions, feel free to ask.
Wow, Athena, you hit me on the soft spot. Marketing? Me? Well, everything’s marketing. And there’s no such thing as “bad publicity”.
But for a person who has forgotten his password to statistic counter I don’t really feel like I’m the marketing type. My opinion is that you can recognize marketing and sales people’s lies by watching the body language. If the lips are moving, they are lying.
But the truth is more what Anonymous #23 said. Rambling. That I do, and I do it well. I usually have a point, but I do digress. Lucky for you I can keep it more together on-line than in real life. F.ex. today when we walked to shop with my housemate we discussed about beer, bottle deposit money, going Dutch, Dutch people, Netherlands being Protestant, actually Calvinist, but definetly Protestant based, the Knights Templars who escaped to the two protestant countries, history of Martin Luther, Star Wars, Ian MacKellen, Shakesperian theatre, Rowan Atkinson’s genius… + some random blurts. …and all that just while walking to the shop. :)
(Plus I am a bit proud that the conversation turned in to me instead of the actual topic.)
And as a side note…
#21 Anon: This is a fan site. It is not V who deletes posts here.
V, you stupid bitch!!!
Isn’t it “Dog and pony show” and not “Horse and pony show”…?
The rest of it I couldn’t give a shit about.
PLEASE POST, I’m having withdrawal symptoms!!!
Hed been brought to his old suite of rooms and laid out on his bed. Once she found it, she turned it toward his breath, met his lips with hers. Stay where you are. They stayed on their knees, slapping each others arms aside as they struggled for purchase. Frustration and anger buzzed, blurring her vision. Radins hand at her cheek turned her back to face him. Gala knelt at her side, a reassuring hand on her shoulder. You didnt falter once, even if you were nervous. She needed to do this. Steeling herself, she turned to face Brevin. What do you think, Tyk? I was beginning to wonder if youd lost your mind. I said a lot of things. What shed done before had only amplified it. It sparked the flame, and she dropped to scream into the mattress. Laughing, he grabbed her hips and rolled over. She blinked, never having seen it from that angle. She had no doubt Eyrhaen and each other were their true desires. The curl to his lip was resigned. She licked his lips.